Feeling better?

So, like I previously mentioned, I went on the hunt for a colon cleanser and came up with Dr. Natura. Safe, all-natural and reasonably priced. They claim to help you feel better, inside and out, and detoxify your liver and stuff like that. There's a pill for the liver cleanse, a fiber powder for the colon and then a supplement tea that you're supposed to drink at night before bed to help release all the toxins while you sleep and stuff.

Lemme tell ya ... I feel pretty darned good! In the beginning, though, I had some light cramping but nothing more than a small achy feeling. After 2 days, though, it went away and the cleanse was on! It's been a couple of weeks now (I lost track of my days, you know how it is) and I feel great - lighter than I've ever felt before, plus I've lost a few pounds, too!

So if you're lookin' to feel better, try checking out Dr. Natura. It's a pretty good deal, and I wasn't always in the bathroom, either :p

Selling out

My poor exercise bike, still getting no good use out of it. Know why?  Because I'm now on my feet for a good portion of the day at work, and I'm sore and exhausted by the time I come home. My arthritic feet are having a hard time taking this news, and until I get used to the stair-climbing and general business, I'm afraid my exercise bike will have to wait :(

The good news? I think I'm losing weight by default. Up and down those stairs plus being massively sweaty during my work day means my appetite for those eight hours is basically nil. I mean, I eat something for breakfast and bring my lunch with me to work but I don't feel like snacking or anything - and snacking used to be my downfall. During times when I'm bored or lonely - just when I generally have some downtime - I tend to snack. Like most things, I wish I knew the psychological reasoning for this but I don't. It's just something I'll have to learn to get around, and working my ass off seems to be getting my mind off food :)

As much as I hate to do it, I'm thinking about selling my poor little bike .... but then again, I might be in need of it one day, like a weekend day, and really wish I had it. I'm moving into a new apartment soon, so it's either now or never if I'm selling out.

Holy sickness

Quite simply, I don't feel good. I'll spare you kind readers from all the gory details 'cause it ain't pretty, so rest easy. Today has been long and arduous, and tomorrow doesn't look to be any better. But I'll be looking at an apartment tomorrow, so perhaps the day might take a unique twist. There might even be a car search somewhere in there, as well. I've put in over $1500 this year to keep my POS running and I'm really tired of it.

My legs seem to be getting stronger from all the stairwork and my job, and my appetite is sort of leveling off. Being sick today isn't helping that, either, but my poor exercise bike is now collecting dust. I promise to do right by it in the end, though.

Icky!

If ever there was a plan to lose weight at work, my job has it. This has been my, what ... fourth or fifth day in my new position at my old job, and I am finding that I now sweat my big booty off most of the day. Even in a temperature controlled environment with an oscillating fan ... I still manage to sweat. Not cute, glowing sweat, either - large buckets of sweat. Oh, well. Better for losing weight? That and those stairs are going to get me in shape, like it or not!

Being so hot most of the day also decreases my appetite, so I guess my job is determined to make me lose weight one way or the other! I'm still drinking lots of water during the day, which is especially needed now that I'm so stinkin' sweaty. Hopefully a new haircut tomorrow will also help me stay cooler. Changes abound!

I should know better

Today, my mother and I took my son to the Abraham Lincoln National Historic Park, as well as some other places. For the most part it was pretty fun - there was even a nature walk through the land around his birthplace, very serene. When we were through gawking and taking pictures, we took our sweaty selves to lunch at a chicken place. This is where I should have known better than to eat someone else's chicken when away from home. As a general rule, chicken - whether it be grilled, breaded or fried - makes me ill when I eat it at a restaurant. I don't know if it's the spices or what, but I've now spent the last several hours sick as a dog and fervently wishing I hadn't eaten it. Death seems welcome as an option at this point, rather than this sickness. UGH.

My bike still sits there looking at me, and I apologize to it on a daily basis. Due to a change in positions at my place of employment, I now walk up and down a set of about 20 stairs several times a day. So when I get home, the last thing on my mind is working my sore leg muscles. Maybe the stairs will be good for me .... ?

Sigh

It's been a most crazy week, so my exercise bike and I haven't had time to get acquainted ... but I'm hoping tonight I might be able to, or possibly tomorrow before I go to my foot appointment. I'm tired of it staring at me like I'm a freak loser who bought it but won't use it. Motivation is also a big part of this ... I've been so tired and in so much pain lately that I'm not fond of doing things that bring on more pain, i.e. exercise bike. But I promise, before the week is up, my butt will be sitting on it again.

It's just that right now I'm in a self-destructive love/hate tryst with chocolate, and I can't seem to leave the relationship for good. That says a lot about me right there, doesn't it? Sigh.

Apology

Dear Exercise Bike:

I see you sitting there, staring at me while I do homework and watch TV, read and play with my son. Don't try to hide it, I know you're lonely, and I am, too. You were so happy when you came home with me, thinking you'd finally be useful! ... and you will be. There were some hard, busy days last week and I'm sorry you sat there by yourself.

But this week, Dear Bike, I plan on using you and making you happy. In just a few short hours, I will be sitting on you and pedaling my way to freedom while you smile and accept your usefulness. That tryst I had with food this weekend didn't mean anything, and you know it - you're my exercise love, and I should really pay more attention to you.

So I'm sorry, Exercise Bike. You and I will soon reacquaint our friendship, and be besties once again. I love you, and thank you for supporting me (literally)!

Love,
Mary

Hmm...

As I sit here eating an entire bowl of SmartOnes (or Smartpop? Something Smart ... ) with M&M's, I realize that I've pretty much blown this entire week. Donuts one day, eating out last night with the guys from work, my aforementioned popcorn freakout tonight ... geez. I try to do so well during the day, you know? But it's always one thing (well, in the case of the donuts, three things) that throws me off at some point. I wish the guy in my office that constantly eats would go away. Seriously. By the time I ate my Lean Pocket and string cheese for lunch at 12:30, he'd already eaten his lunch and 3 snacks! WHY?! Two more snacks before I left at 3:00, too? GEEZ! He needs to go away. Like, yesterday.

And why is it called Smart popcorn, anyway? (Smart Pop? Smart Balance? Smart Ones? ... I think the last one is a Weight Watchers product, though - not popcorn). What's so friggin smart about it? It doesn't make me lose weight, I'm still eating. It doesn't do my homework for me, although I wish it would. Smart Water, Smart Ones, Smart Pop (or whatever) - this "smart" craze is one that needs to phase out.

Smart Water? You mean to tell me people are going to buy water called that? It's w-a-t-e-r.

Are you kidding me??

My apples ended up being icky in the middle so I had to throw them away. I then go back to the break room to cook my Lean Pocket and ... wtf are those white boxes in the middle of the table? DOUGHNUT BOXES?! Are you absolutely kidding me today, Dear World?

Sigh. Three donuts later, and I'm in total regret and possible denial. Today was a horrible day, maybe tomorrow will be less stressful and doughnut-free in its entirety.

I call do-over

This day is sucking already. In fact, this whole week is impossibly sucking so far, and it's only Wednesday! Yesterday, I wanted to mindlessly eat and I couldn't figure out why. I tried to curb the impulse as best I could, but I was tired and miserable. Today, I'm hungry even though I've eaten breakfast, and I also started the day by falling off the kitchen step into the garage. Go me, huh? So I hurt, and I cried, and then I drove to work where I promptly smashed my thumb between my desk chair and desk. At this point, I'm surprised I'm still alive.

I bought a new scale the other day, and it tells me I weight 4 more pounds than I did at the end of July, yet I've gone down at least one whole size. Sigh. Is it possible that technology is against the advancement of weight loss, too? I feel down today, and am really fighting the urge to run out and get a donut. Why a donut, I don't know since I haven't had a doughnut in ages. Maybe I'll eat my apple and continue to look online for ways to make additional money by writing; that seems to be my go-to activity as of late.

Should I even attempt the exercise bike tonight with the clumsy way my day is turning out? I'm afraid of getting caught in the pedals or something at this point.

Blueberry Hell

It took me a long time before I could stomach the thought of blueberries - years, in fact. But several years ago, when I moved to Maine I didn't know it was, like, the Blueberry Capital of the World ... or something like that. Blueberries everywhere. There was even a building shaped like a blueberry and painted a hideous purplish-blue - tourists loved the giant eyesore, but I was appalled. Anyway, everything was made with blueberries, and my husband-at-the-time, well - his family was in love with blueberries, so I ate a lot of them.

I'll admit, it's not a bad fruit when used in moderation. And when they're mixed in a delicious muffin sprinkled with crystallized sugar I'm a huge fan. I think I may have even eaten them in a berry parfait before. So while I'm not totally opposed to thinks of the blueberry nature, I am not keen on them being in yogurt, or other dairy products.

Sure, I love strawberry yogurt. I even like the yogurt that tastes like other foods - like cheesecake, pie, etc. - and I am generally opposed to foods tasting like other foods. So when I was at the store today looking at yogurt, I decided to try this Greek yogurt everyone is raving about. "Two times the protein!" "Beat the mid-day hunger blues!" I was all gung-ho for it, but for some reason unbeknownst to me, it's all blueberry flavored. Of all the flavors to lure people in to try their yogurt, blueberry was the best they could come up with? I couldn't find strawberry, or even plain vanilla. It was blueberry hell everywhere I looked. What's up with that?

I walked away with Yoplait Crunch strawberry cups, totally disillusioned over Greek yogurt. It may have ruined me for trying it ever again, even if I can find it in other, normal flavors. Sigh.

Good morning!

Whew! Just past 8 in the morning, and I've already had breakfast and ridden the exercise bike 3.5 miles. Hooah! Gonna be a good day, I can tell. I wish I could ride the bike every morning before my shower, but I'd have to get up sooo early, and I already wake up at 5:15 - any earlier just ain't happenin'.

I think I'll ride it again after dinner, since I seem to be on a roll. The only thing I wonder about is how much weight I've lost, since I haven't weighed myself since the end of July. Surely I've lost some weight by then! Maybe I'll invest in a scale soon.

Weekend!

Today is the start of what I hope is going to be a really good 3-day weekend. My son seems like he's coming down with a cold, though, so the Festival we were going to go to tomorrow may have to be postponed :(

However ... I've had a pretty good week food-wise, and I feel good about that. Worked out tonight for 22 minutes, and it felt good! YAY!

Moving to Kentucky was the best decision at this time in my life. I was miserable and upset in my situation in Minnesota, that's for sure. I had at least 4 nervous breakdowns in 3 years, stopped caring about myself, my son, my apartment ... stopped caring about life. I became angry at the world around me, and felt like I was always going to be chasing my tail, going nowhere.

But I've been in Kentucky now about two-and-a-half months, and I'm starting to discover who I am again. The good news? I bought some new pants yesterday, and they were a size smaller than even my new size. You know what that means? I've lost 2 pants sizes since June, and it's all due to  being in a different situation with people that can love me, support me, and help me live life again. That means the absolute world to me, and I wouldn't change it for anything. I have a good steady job, I have a (mostly) working car, I'm with my family again ... hopefully my boyfriend will be here next month ....

Six months ago I never knew I could have it this good.

On a quest for a good shampoo!

I don't like to admit it, but I have thinning hair. 29 years old, and I have thinning hair. I thought at  first it was from my pregnancy, you know? All those hormones make your hair grow in lush and thick and shiny and then because Life thinks it's funny it makes all that hair fall out again. But no ... this is just where I'm destined to go, I guess.

So I've set out on the quest for a great shampoo, something preferably with oils or vitamins or ... I don't know, something that will help my hair stay on my head! So I went looking at Become.com looking for tea tree shampoo, which I hear is awesome for making thick, shiny hair. Looking at it, it's also fairly reasonably priced, so I might check it out. I'm also going to look for keratin shampoo, since I hear that it's got protein and is good for strengthening hair.

And because I need something to coif all of this newly luxurious hair I'm going to have (eventually), I'll need a new hair blow dryer. Mine is something from the 80's, I think, and blows ridiculously warm air. Time for a new one? Sigh. Probably. While I'm looking, I should probably look for grey hair shampoos, too, since that also runs in the family. And I'm already starting to get them! What? I'm not old enough yet!

Well, one day ... in the meantime, I'm off to find a great shampoo. Maybe I'll find one that'll help me lose weight, too :)

Le sigh

I haven't been sleeping well lately, then I wake up at 5:15 every day with the alarm, since work is at 7:00. I can't keep doing this, it's wearing me out :( Last night, I kept hearing noises and imagining things which made me sleep with the lamp on for part of bed time - the other part, I was wondering if I'd slept through my alarm. I've already gone through a horribly long bout of insomnia this year, I can't do that again. I mean, I get sleepy - really sleepy - but I'm having trouble staying asleep.

Therefore, I had absolutely zero motivation to work out tonight; my body is so tired. I tried, at least,  but only got 5 minutes in before I could barely keep my eyes open. Maybe tomorrow will be better ... I know they can't all be good ones, and I guess this is just one of those times.

*yawn*